Feminism, summer cherries, and cluster vs claustrophobia
i. ruminating, curating, and inspiring your week ahead
Inspiration for your week ahead
Hello there.
Welcome to the dawn of a new year. How are you? How have you spent the opening hours and days?
Moving into a new year is always exciting to me. I love the countdown, the turning over of time, the anticipation and newness. I love the chance to begin anew. Last year our correspondences were somewhat sporadic; the transition back to university was…turbulent. I didn’t get the chance to sit and write to you with the curiosity and verve I began this newsletter with—at least not quite as often as I would have liked. My favourite pieces are the ones I’ve sat with for months. It is my hope to write more of those for you; deeply considered ideas over surface-level musings.
Still, there is so much to ruminate over in between. So, welcome to your new Monday letter: a curation of moments, musings, recommendations, and inspiration to spark your curiosity for the week ahead. Or, a weekly glimpse into my mind.
This weekly letter is an offering best enjoyed by paying subscribers. If you believe my writing is worth one mug of your favourite hot drink a month, please consider upgrading to a paid subscription. I pour my heart into this letter and hope to elevate Ruminations’ quality further this year. I want you to receive nothing short of the best, dear one. Every cent goes back into my craft and allows me time to produce the free personal essays Ruminations is known for.
A start-of-year offering, valid until Jan 13th <3
I love you. Welcome to the new year. Let us live beautifully.
Caitlin x
Noticing
The poetry in the everyday
i. Light-chasing at every given moment. Giving in to the magnetic pull of sunbeams across wood floorboards. Sitting in the window’s halo. Watching the shifting, filtered glow swing across the coffee table, the couch, the wall, and back again. Mourning the final spots of sun as they fade into shadow.
ii. I’m in a wood cabin in Augusta. The slats are warm; honey-gold. They run vertically before careening inwards to roof the loft. This is where I am writing from.
iii. If one begins the year at their worst, surely it means they will end the year at their best. Surely.
iv. Offerings of snapdragon and marigold seeds. Cucumbers curling on the vine, poised for plucking.
v. Vivid, deranged dreams. Visions of a girl, screaming at me, terrified, enraged. She shares my face.
vi. Igniting fires in a cast iron fireplace. Remembering friends from across the world through the motions they taught me. Wishing we can once again share in the joy of watching a flame catch and bloom.
Curating
A collection of evocative images and things
Ruminating
Things I’ve been mulling over & recommend
This week: new year lists, pop stars and paedophilia, reflecting on my relationship to feminism as a writer and researcher, the fine line between cluster and claustrophobia, and more…
Ins & Outs: I love reading everyone’s lists. Here are a few I’ve enjoyed:
My relationship with the term ‘feminist’. Mostly its connotations, history, and future, how I want to align with the term in my research this year, and I guess as a person in the future. In a paper I wrote last sem, I referred to myself as a ‘devout feminist’ and the assessor highlighted it and questioned my use of the term ‘devout’, as well as my decision to align myself with feminism so early in my academic career. I’d be lying if I claimed this didn’t throw me. I’m very curious about this interaction and, if anything, have become more interested in feminist ontology and epistemology as a result.
Landon Parrot’s YouTube videos. They’re so well made and resonate with my approach to life as an artist and dreamer. Your life is a museum; you are the artist.
This essay on Sabrina Carpenter selling a paedophilic fantasy
I realised this week that my beautiful roll-top desk will likely need to go. Beautiful as it is, the desk space is short and shallow, the shelves are full of things, and although the desk and many things on it are beautiful, they overwhelm me. I’ve learned I work best with S P A C E. For me, ample space to work in is akin to a blank canvas to paint on. When it’s cramped and already full, I struggle to think. Empty space gives my brain room to roam. Ironically, I love the girlswhocluster page on Instagram. Theoretically, it’s cute. But in practice? It romanticises overconsumption and makes me feel claustrophobic. I’m not sure what a new workspace would look like for me (particularly given that I share it with my partner), but I do know a change is needed.
Poeticising
A poem I implore you to read
Till next week, my loves <3
In case you missed it…
